Shepherds As Fathers
By Genevieve S. Kineke
Copyright © 2006
The
five men looked intently at the table in front of them as
they sat side-by-side before the assembled audience. They
seemed deep in thought as the attractive middle-aged woman
read out to all the definition of clericalism, then asked
who wanted to respond first. Coughs, uncomfortable shifting
in the seats, and then one looked up. "'David', shall
we start with you?" she asked him gently.
He stood up and looked at the people. "I have been
a member of the clerical state for 47 years, starting with
my tonsure many years ago," he began by way of explanation.
What followed was a rambling account of those years — happy
years, busy years, the rich years of a priest who has answered
the call to serve, but now is struggling to define that priesthood
to people who see hierarchy, authority, and outward marks
of "caste" as obstacles to the faith.
This, dear reader, was simply one among many Voice of the
Faithful meetings in a small state rocked with its own priest
scandals. Despite a population that is nearly three-quarters
Catholic, the lay faithful are confused and seeking answers
from a variety of sources. Thus Voice of the Faithful has
found rich soil in which to plant its own solutions — for
better or worse.
On the assumption that clericalism — falsely defined
as any marked distinction between priests and the laity — is
at the source of the present problems, these priests mulled
over how they had allowed that distinction to affect their
lives in the past. Following one another in turn, the ordained
men admitted that the collar can make a difference when police
pull them over, in the past it has gotten them into Broadway
shows, has opened doors in the emergency room without question,
and yet now has declining effect in getting discounts at
the drug store, which different men deal with in varying
degrees of frustration. What could have led to this mundane
account of the state of Holy Orders? How can a discussion
of those called to configure Christ Himself and provide grace
to a fallen world find itself at this level of inanity?
In answer to subsequent questions, they moved on in their
defense to offer glowing testimonies about gifted members
of their parishes who had stepped forward to share talents
of all kinds, and their openness to such help was a hallmark
of their fight against clericalism. From changing light bulbs,
to visiting the families of the deceased, the laity had myriad
talents, which were profiled and praised, culminating in
the remark by one pastor that he simply signed the checks
(written by others) and said Mass when asked.
All five stressed the importance of the Mass but again — in
their effort to be seen opposing “clericalism” — explained
that lay-participation was maximized in their parishes and
that rubrics that set the priest apart from the rest of the
assembly were frowned upon. They pointed out that the priest — as
host of the meal — was rude to eat first in front of
his "guests." One apologized for the priest standing
during the consecration while the rest were asked to kneel.
Such “clerical” rubrics, they realized only divided
people, instead of uniting the People of God as was needed.
All that was missing were the whips for the self-flagellation.
As I watched this sad display, I was struck by the similarity
of the state of the priesthood with the state of the family,
and the common point is the attack on fatherhood. For whatever
reasons, men who function as fathers are taking a beating.
They are the butt of countless jokes, ridiculed widely on
sit-coms, emasculated by women and children, and forced to
prove themselves worthy only through their concerted rejection
of authority, leadership, strength, and firm principles.
Fathers can find acceptance in society only insofar as they
follow direction well, avoid promoting their own preferences,
and refrain from intimidating others — which can prove
difficult when their very masculinity sets many women's teeth
on edge.
The rubrics are not the issue. The division of labor is
not the issue. Whether or not to wear the collar outside
the rectory is not the issue. These are distractions from
the fundamental fact that masculinity is being systematically
destroyed and that men have been so brow-beaten that the
very idea of fatherhood has been corrupted by accompanying
assumptions about bullying, intimidation, and abuse of authority.
Men have allowed this notion to keep them from taking up
their fatherhood from God, from whom all fathers get their
name, and from exercising the firm leadership that the Church
so desperately needs. The fathers of families refrain from
leading for fear that they will be confused with dictators,
and the fathers of souls similarly cannot speak clearly about
distinguishing good from evil for fear that it will undermine
the consensus dynamic that their flocks insist upon.
So here we sit, watching grown men squirm — insisting
that the laity can really do most of the work of the Church
and that delegation is the name of the game. So many men
in this "modern world" are near anachronisms, bound
to spousal unions of one sort or another, yet unable to guard
and guide their brides and offspring because of the widespread
fear of authentic masculinity. The loving care, gentle guidance,
and latent courage that they bear within goes stagnant and
withers until it is no longer available to the world. Poor
sad world, poor sad fathers who have lost sight of the magnificent
men that they are called to be. Poor sad Church, left to
wander until her priests take up the mantle to restore fatherhood
to all its glory. |